Prisoner of Trebekistan: the Table of Contents

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Who Hates Whom:
Well-Armed Fanatics,
Intractable Conflicts,
and Various Things Blowing Up
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“Revelatory... Harris's sly wit and infectious curiosity make understanding world chaos fascinating... witty, horrific, and necessary.”

-- Boston Globe

"Brave... irreverent... charges into the thick of the globe's myriad simmering wars... hilariously relaxed."

-- New York Observer

“Fascinating, enlightening, and surprisingly: NOT TOTALLY DEPRESSING.”

-- John Hodgman,
author, The Areas of My Expertise and correspondent for The Daily Show

"A rollicking ride of intellectual discovery and emotional growth... his comic timing never fails"

-- The Wall Street Journal

"A surprisingly touching memoir"

-- Entertainment Weekly

"Effortlessly funny and informative... tender, human, and very wise... A must for anyone who loves Jeopardy!, or has ever seen it, or is breathing."

-- Joss Whedon, creator, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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Prisoner of Trebekistan: the Table of Contents

Prisoner of Trebekistan

Here's the actual Table of Contents for Prisoner of Trebekistan, sans page numbers, which I couldn't figure out how to format neatly here.

Like the index, this may eventually get a musical treatment, maybe over some Al Jarreau-style scat singing or maybe a reggae thing. Why? I have no idea. Just seems amusing.

Chapter One : Why Alex May Not Have A Physical Body

Also, Choosing The Correct Millisecond

Chapter Two: A Complete Inability To Learn From Failure

Also, Incompetence, Ignorance, and Clumsiness

Chapter Three: The Thing That Came From Merv's Dining Room

Also, A Hiawatha Much Bigger Than Yours

Chapter Four: Close Your Eyes, Breathe Deeply, And Scream

Also, I Discover More In My Head Than Just Knowledge

Chapter Five: Halloween Comes Suddenly

Also, Scandalous Thoughts About Ned Flanders's Wife

Chapter Six: Thinking Ahead While Not Thinking At All

Also, Safety Instructions For Your Jeopardy Weapon

Chapter Seven: How Everything Is Connected

Also, Twenty-One Interesting Uses For Rubber

Chapter Eight: Evening Falls

Also, A Fifty-Foot Wall In My Head

Chapter Nine: Fun With Howards End

Also, I Kick William Shakespeare's Ass

Chapter Ten: The Longest Day

Also, I Am Attacked By Ravenous Badgers

Chapter Eleven: The War Comes Home

Also, Detaching My Althing From My Knesset

Chapter Twelve: Jeopardy Fever

Also, I Am Ambushed By The Bishop Of Hippo

Chapter Thirteen: Facing The Think Music

Also, Strangers Seize Me By The Udder And Yank

Chapter Fourteen: We're Malaysia-Bound

Also, Why People Are Looking At Me Funny In This Coffee Shop

Chapter Fifteen: A Hail Mary For Anthony Hopkins

Also, Fishing Up The Urethra

Chapter Sixteen: Things To Do On Jeopardy When You're Dead

Also, Private Moments With Mrs. Butterworth

Chapter Seventeen: A Pep Talk From President Garfield

Also, What I Bought From The J.H. Gilbert Co. Of Willoughby, Ohio

Chapter Eighteen: Greed, A Quick Smush, And A Shameful Little Booby

Also, I Help With Another Howard's End

Chapter Nineteen: Jane

Also, Jane

Chapter Twenty: The Importance of Memory In Recovery

Also, A Brief Look At Estonian Revolutionary Movements

Chapter Twenty-One: My Life As A Rockette

Also, Why I Have An Ancient Civilization In My Pants

Chapter Twenty-Two: Attack Of The Pudu

Also, I Get Lost In Africa, And Not For the Last Time

Chapter Twenty-Three: Love, Kindness, And An Old Chicken Sandwich

Also, Why Penguins Throw Up Down Under

Chapter Twenty-Four: The Ultimate Tournament

Also, I Swear Off the Weapon

Chapter Twenty-Five: Not Quite Letting Go Of Outcome

Also, A Massive Explosion Caught Live On Videotape

Chapter Twenty-Six: Where All Knowledge Is Kept

Also, Eleven More Sentences That Are Actually True

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